Dear Smiley: Your mention of driver’s ed in the Wednesday column reminded me of the not-to-be-forgotten driver’s license test for my sister.
After taking the written part of the exam, it was time to take the OMV guy for a ride and do the stop signs, hand signals and also the compulsory emergency stop on a desolate street in Napoleonville.
Everything went great for my sister until the emergency stop portion of the test.
When it came time to slam the brakes and remain in control of the metal beast, she forgot that my mother had left a basket of fresh yard eggs on the back seat that she was going to deliver to the local grocery store after the test! Talk about an omelet!
Mr. Dugas, the OMV guy, never let my sister forget it. Whenever he would see her he would ask “Got any eggs today?”
Speaking of eggs
Dear Smiley: A certain box store that matches ads told me they didn’t match egg ads because it was a dairy product. Now at 85 I am really confused!
How could an egg be classified a dairy product? Someone please clarify this to me. I know this is a crazy world, but a chicken laying butter?
Game of chicken
Dear Smiley: My possum story goes back 69 years, when I was first courting my wife, and was taking her home after being out for the evening.
With her dad’s midnight curfew approaching, I was trying to get a final kiss on the front porch before leaving when her dad crashed through the screen door with a shotgun in hand.
I am too embarrassed to say what almost happened to me at the time.
Then her father said, “There is a possum after the chickens.”
I survived, but the possum did not.
Our courtship continued, and we were married the following year.
Dear Smiley: Emma, our first grandchild, recently became engaged, which reminded me:
Less than a month after I graduated from Louisiana College, Virginia and I decided to get married.
Although there were less than four weeks till the wedding, my mother was determined to lose weight. I still laugh when remembering her declaring, “I will not have it said that the mother of the groom floated down the isle and docked.”
KIM “POPS” SEAGO
Nice guy’s gift
Dear Smiley: I was sad to learn that newsman Paul Gates had died. I was fortunate enough to have actually met him twice, when he co-hosted the “Stirring It Up” cooking segment on WAFB. I was invited to appear with him and Chef John Folse as they prepared my recipes.
On the last segment, I admired Paul’s apron and asked where I could buy one. He offered to give me the one he was wearing when the show was over.
He was a tough investigative reporter, but he was a pleasant man who would give you the shirt...or the apron...off his back.
Swath with spats
Dear Smiley: Your mention of seersucker suits in the Wednesday column brought fond memories of my grandfather, who was a snappy dresser.
He had a seersucker suit and a white linen one. He wore a Panama hat with the ensemble, and his shoes had spats on them. He cut quite a swath.
Mike and Michelle?
Dear Smiley: If LSU decides to replace the current Mike, they may want to check out Tiger Creek Wildlife Refuge, off I-20 near Tyler, Texas.
The current Mike’s sister and brother are there (Sarge and Lily). They came from the Indiana refuge where Mike came from.
Not sure that Tiger Creek would be interested in losing the two tigers, but it would be worth checking.
If LSU could get both tigers, it might make for a better environment then just having one tiger in the big enclosure they have for Mike.
They have lived together at Tiger Creek, so having them together here should work out OK.
Dear Smiley: Sign by a small park in Metairie:
NO PETS SMOKING MOTORIZED VEHICLES IN TOT LOT
It is a good thing my dog only smokes bicycles.
Dear Smiley: When I was a young lad I was in the Boy Scouts.
One time on a camping trip, our wonderful scoutmaster was assigning jobs to cook a meal.
He said, “Joe, peel the potatoes; Fred, peel the peelings.”
I guess he knew his boys.