Les Fogleman, of Ponchatoula, says, “When I was a pre-teen in the mid-’50s, living in Colfax, I would go with my dad on Sundays to a small church near Boyce, where he preached.
“There was a man in the church who was a clown. We had to watch for practical jokes, as he was always being funny.
“One Sunday night I was sitting on the second pew from the front and dad was preaching.
“For some reason, I turned to look behind me, and there he sat with his family.
“I fell out of the pew laughing uncontrollably, and ran out of the church laughing hilariously. Outside I literally fell on the ground laughing.
“He had taken two pocket matches and placed them in his eyes, holding his eyelids open as if he was having trouble staying awake.
“My dad didn’t think it was funny at all.”
Dorothy Schneider tells a belated Easter story:
“Years ago, when my children were small, we had gone to visit friends the Saturday before Easter, and came home after dark.
“When we pulled in the driveway, the car’s headlights shined into the yard, revealing a real live wild rabbit.
“I exclaimed to the children, ‘Look! It’s the Easter Bunny. He really is for real!’
“Immediately, all the children jumped forward to see the bunny through the windshield — even the oldest, who thought she knew the truth about the Easter Bunny.
“Their dad piped up and said to them, ‘And you’re not even in bed yet!’
“Of course, we all know the Easter Bunny doesn’t come if you’re not in your bed.
“Fearing the Easter Bunny would leave without leaving their baskets, the children set a record for getting ready for and into bed!”
Not eggs-actly fair
“Seeing the stories of Easter egg knocking reminds me of that activity in my youth,” says Ernie Gremillion.
“We referred to it as pocking, and it involved all the kids in the neighborhood to determine the ultimate strongest egg.
“It was such an accomplishment to be the ultimate winner that some kids would resort to various tricks to get an advantage.
“One was to put a thin layer of airplane glue on the pocking end, let it harden and then dye over the glue.
“We quickly learned how to detect if an egg had been glued, and would turn down any challenge from the owner of that one.”
Mike Nola says, “I was talking recently to an elderly lady I met in a doctor’s office.
“When she told me she had been a widow for quite a few years, I asked her if she had ever thought of remarrying.
“She quickly informed me that she did think about it, but was afraid she’d marry someone just like the first one!
“P.S.: She wasn’t laughing...”
Mel Daigle says, “Back in the ’50s, living in Grand Bayou, we had access to and enjoyed fish, wild game, crawfish and lots of vegetables.
“During crawfish season Mom seemed to always have crawfish stew cooking.
“In order to stretch a meal, Mom would add crawfish stew over fried fish, eggplant, poultry, etc. This would feed our family of six and a neighbor or two.”
Mel says those kinds of meals in restaurants today would be very expensive — if you could even find them.
Charlene Esposito comments on our series on “earworms” (or “brainworms”), songs that get stuck in your head:
“In my office-working days, I would get bored (after doing the same job for seven years), thinking of all the things I needed to do at home — if only I could be home!
“My ‘brainworm’ was ‘Home, home on the range, where the deer and the antelope play’...
“And I’d sing it out loud! I’m sure one of my past co-workers would remember!”
In our “Who Needs Heloise?” Dept., Doug Johnson, of Watson, offers “a simple, cheap, and very effective treatment that will remove all pain and itching from fire ant bites in a matter of minutes.
“As soon as possible, rub a small amount of household ammonia or bleach into the bite area. It also works to relieve other insect bites and stings.
“I’ve used it for years, and am amazed at how well it works. Once, when stung by a wasp, I used it and could not even see any indication of the sting two hours later.”
Dan Burkhalter, the Carencro Curmudgeon, says, “Driving on I-49 to Opelousas, I passed a truck hauling half of a double-wide mobile home.
“A passenger in the back seat said, ‘Oh, someone got a divorce.’
“My first thought was, ‘Dumb is not restricted to hair color.’
“Then I thought, ‘If it happened that way, who would get the kitchen and who would get the bathroom?’”
Good question — I’m still pondering which I would prefer...
Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.