Richard Fossey, who teaches at UL-Lafayette, has a “choosing your college” story:

“My friend John has lived in Baton Rouge for many years, but he is a graduate of Auburn University.

“When his children were young, John and his wife, Mary, lived in Alabama, and John was worried that some of his children might want to enroll at the University of Alabama.

“Fortunately, John’s family lived within driving distance of an Alabama paper mill that gave off a terrible odor. John said he would occasionally drive his children by the mill and tell them to roll down the car windows and take a deep breath.

“‘That is the University of Alabama,’ he told his kids while pointing at the paper mill. ‘Don’t ever go there.’

“John’s children are grown now, and he tells me that all of them graduated from college. Not all of them attended Auburn, but John said none of them went to school at the University of Alabama.”

Age over youth

The death of famed Baton Rouge band leader Buddy Boudreaux at 97 reminds me of a story, not about his music but his golf game.

Buddy was a member of the Octogenarians Golf Club, organized by the late JoPaul Steiner. Since golf is one of those games you can play, and play well, for a long time, the 80-somethings had a good record in charity tournaments.

They took me along to a tournament in Gretna that featured sports figures from the New Orleans area. (I don’t play golf, but they needed somebody to make sure the beer was iced down.)

After the tournament, when we gathered in the clubhouse for a meal and the awarding of trophies, we were sitting next to Billy Joe Hobert, one of the Saints quarterbacks at the time.

He had his back to us, so he couldn’t see Buddy, JoPaul and the others when he told some of his Saints buddies that “those old guys kicked our butts!”

The “old guys” got a tremendous kick out of it, and talked about it all the way back to Baton Rouge.

Let Jerry do it

“Whilst dining in a Baton Rouge restaurant,” says Ronnie Hotz, of Lafayette, “I overheard folks at the next table talking about our state Legislature.

“Someone said, ‘The answer to our problem could be solved very easily. We need Jerry Manda.’

“So I thought about that, and realized they were right. If Jerry Manda could apply his expertise towards state government as successfully as he has in making the best sausage ever, our problems would be diminished.”

Way to celebrate!

Don Rogers, of Denham Springs, says, “My wife, Wanda, and I celebrated our 60th anniversary this past Thursday, June 11.

“When our 50th was approaching back in 2005, Wanda told our two sons and one daughter that she expected them to do something special in recognition of that day. They did.

“One of our sons took his family to Hawaii, our daughter took her family to Disney World — and our other son took us out to dinner.”

Inquiring Minds Dept.

“As kids, we had to wait an hour or half an hour after eating before going back to swimming, or we might get a cramp and drown,” says Alex “Sonny” Chapman, of Ville Platte.

“No adult ever explained to my satisfaction just what a cramp was and what body part it was supposed to hit. Is that still a rule?”

Good Samaritans

Beverlye Patterson thanks two nurses at Baton Rouge Rehabilitation Hospital, Bruce and Nick, for changing her flat tire while she got a haircut at the Paris Parker salon on Jefferson Highway:

“My car had been rumbling and shaking and not wanting to steer for a couple of blocks. As it reluctantly turned into the Paris Parker parking lot, two tall young men in a pickup truck pulled up behind me.

“They asked, ‘Would you like some help?’

“They told me to go ahead and get my haircut and they would change the tire. Less than 20 minutes later they came inside and returned my keys. I hope these kind, helpful young gentlemen will read this.

“This happened the Friday after Mother’s Day, and a lady in the waiting room with me said, ‘Their mothers raised them well.’”

Special People Dept.

— On Monday, June 15, Millie Broussard, of Lafayette, celebrated her 96th birthday.

— Helen Boudreaux, of Convent, celebrated her 92nd birthday on Monday, June 15.

Disarmed in Houston

Linda H. Whitman, of Denham Springs, says, “Our grandson Colt was pulled out of line by the TSA guy Saturday night in Houston at the airport. He had a nickel-plated Colt .45 concealed in his backpack.

“Since the cap gun was broken and he is only 6 years old, they confiscated it and let him fly anyway. Never a dull moment flying with kids!”

Shame on you!

Barney Fussell is evidently not a fan of the Rebels baseball team in our neighboring state. He claims “OMAHA” means “Ole Miss At Home Again!”

Contacting Smiley

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0351 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.