Human Condition: One man’s musing on 50th high school reunion _lowres

 

It was my wife’s 50th reunion, but we are the same age and had the same friends, just different high schools. Back in those days, Corpus Christi was a much smaller community.

The first thing you notice at a 50th reunion is that there are fewer attendees. If you wear the wrong name tag, most people won’t know the difference for at least an hour.

The group I hung out with in 1965 didn’t take drugs. Now, we all do.

All the girls who said they once had a crush on me should have mentioned this five decades ago.

“So, how have you been?” is a really stupid question to ask someone you haven’t seen in 50 years.

People will remember stuff about you that even you don’t remember. This is nothing to be concerned about. I hope.

I hugged people I would never have hugged in 1965.

A few people thought I was the brother of Maria Hinojosa, who is a regular commentator on National Public Radio. I let them think they were right.

I told many of the women they looked great for 68. My buddy, Richard Garcia, told them they looked great for 48. Guess who did better with the ladies in high school?

It was great to see some old faces, although some of us had new faces over the old ones. Many of the beauties had lost their good looks. But a few of the wallflowers had blossomed into really attractive women. I heard one of the former wallflowers say, “Well, it looks like time has been the great equalizer.”

Despite a good cross-section of race and religion, we all had two things in common — Social Security and Medicare.

Some people danced, but there wasn’t nearly as much making out on the dance floor as 50 years ago.

Half of the attendees thought the men aged better than the women. Guess which half thought that?

No one left the reunion intoxicated. But a couple of the guys arrived that way.

A few of my friends brought their old yearbook and wanted me to sign it. All I could think of to write was “Good luck in college.”

There was some talk at the reunion about sex in high school. Back in high school, it was all talk.

My prom date, Delores, gave me a big kiss hello. It wasn’t just the first time we’d kissed in 50 years, it was the only time — and that includes the prom.

A lot of people said things to each other like, “We sure had fun together,” but it was hard for some of us to come up with specifics.

There was very little interest in forming a 75th reunion committee. We finally agreed that getting together every two years or so would be more practical.

My friends in high school laughed at me 50 years ago when I said I would write humorous pieces and have them published in the newspaper. I gave them copies of some of my published stories. Sadly, they’re not laughing now.

— Hinojosa lives in Baton Rouge

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