An "early spring" story from Edwin Barras:

"I have started to mow my lawn, edge, weedwhack and spread 'weed 'n feed.'

"I told my wife I was going to get some bark. She says I have plenty."

Feeling neighborly

Tom Sylvest, of Baton Rouge, says, "One of my old beach buddies, Don Sutton, passed away the other day while I was on the road home from Pensacola Beach. I will miss him much, but will cherish my memories of our time together.

"I recall in particular the time he and his wife, Carrie, and our mutual friend, Michael Curry, stayed with us for the Arkansas vs. LSU football game many years ago.

"They arrived on a Friday afternoon, early enough where I told them I would take them to a neighborhood bar, Phil Brady's.

"Phil's is seven miles from my house. As they followed me in their car, you can imagine their confusion as we traversed across town through Friday traffic.

"Once we arrived, they quizzed me: 'Tom, we thought you said this was a neighborhood bar!'

"I replied, 'It is. It just isn't MY neighborhood.'"

Stone Age jewelry

Joyceline Claverie, of Greenwell Springs, adds to our hospital/surgery tales:

"In 1989 a gallbladder attack landed me in the hospital for two weeks — week one for antibiotics and week two for surgery and recovery.

"A couple of days after surgery, a nurse came into my room with a bottle from my surgeon. It contained my stones — three solid rocks, each measuring 5/8 inch wide and half an inch long.

"After all this time, I'm thinking of entering the jewelry market. One chunk would make a perfect pendant, and the other two dangling earrings!"    

Creative surgery

A reader continues our seminar on tonsillectomies:

"When my granddaughter was 6, she needed her tonsils removed. The doctor told her he would have to cut them out so she could feel better.

"She asked him if he could just PULL them out instead of cutting them out, so it wouldn't hurt so much.

"All laughed, even the doctor."

Heal thyself

Speaking of health care, Del Hahn tells this story:

"Concerned for his wife's hearing, Pierre consulted with Boudreaux, who told him about a simple test he could do at home without his wife's knowledge:

"'Get 50 feet away from her and ask a question. If she doesn't answer, move 10 feet closer and ask her a question. Continue asking at 10-foot intervals until she responds.'

"Pierre started in the bedroom, 50 feet from the kitchen: 'Marie, what's for dinner?' There was no response.

"He moved into the hallway, 40 feet away. Again he asked, 'Marie, what's for dinner?' There was no response.

"Two more tries and still no response. Finally, standing 10 feet from her in the kitchen, he asked, 'Marie, what's for dinner?'

"Marie replied, 'Dammit, Pierre, this is the fifth time I've told you — fried chicken!'"

Comfort bench

Valerie Dugas Medine, of Brusly McCall, says, "The other day I was sitting on a bench outside a big department store. I had my hands in my purse.

"This lady came up to me and asked me how was I doing. I told her, 'I’m doing fine.'

"She said, 'Did you know that you are sitting on our prayer bench?'

"I told her, 'No, I didn’t know.' I proceeded to take my hands out of my purse — I had my rosary wrapped around my hands as I was praying.

"We both looked at each other in disbelief and started laughing.

"She told me her name was Michelle, and asked my name. She made my day…"

Special People Dept.

Tommy Tuminello, of Gonzales, formerly of Gretna, celebrates his 91st birthday on Thursday, March 1.

Cheap wellness

George E. McLean, of Metairie, says, "I ran across a 1951 letter from a company to its employees about a 'wonderful' health plan they were offering:

"Family coverage cost 50 cents a week. ​Benefits included $3 a day for hospital, up to ​$200 for surgery, and $3 a day for doctors' hospital visits."

Louisiana Haiku

Fat pigeon struts by

Stakes claim to city sidewalk

Baguette crumbs for lunch 

Write Smiley at He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.