"My granddaughter already understands men," says Alice Gooch, of Baton Rouge:

"My daughter-in-law sent me this conversation she had with Eva, my 3-year-old granddaughter.

"Eva: 'Eva’s a girl.'

"Mom: 'Yes, Eva’s a girl. What is Mommy?'

"Eva: 'Mommy’s a girl, too.'

"Mom: 'Yes, Mommy’s a girl. What is Daddy?'

"Eva: 'Daddy’s a boy.'

"Mom: 'Yes, Daddy’s a boy.'

"Eva: 'And Mingo’s (their dog) a boy.'

"Mom: 'You’re right, Mingo is a boy. (And with bated breath, I’m sure…) How did you know that?'

"Eva: 'Cause he’s not listening.'"

What a goat!

In the Saturday column, Terry Palmer sought the origin of his dad's sayings about "Hogan's goat."

But "Anonymous from Amite" heard the story as Grogan's goat:

"Bill Grogan’s goat was feeling fine, ate three red shirts from off the line.

"Bill took a stick, gave him a whack, and tied him to the railroad track.

"The whistle blew; the train drew nigh; Bill Grogan’s goat was doomed to die.

"He gave three groans of awful pain, coughed up those shirts and flagged the train."

Cajun version

Bo Bienvenu, of Prairieville, continues our discussion of Hogan's goat:

"Did you know Hogan has a Cajun counterpart with a much less versatile pet — a mute duck.

'My brother, Steve, obviously knows him. When he is asked what he wants to do or what he thinks about something, there are extremely rare occasions when he doesn’t have an opinion and he replies, 'I’m like Patin’s duck — I don’t give a quack.'”

Fit to be tied

Speaking of goats, Faye Guidry says, "Following a caustic remark by my opponent at a duplicate bridge game, I was so upset I misplayed the next hand.

"I'd forgotten the pearl of wisdom: 'No one can get your goat unless you tell them where it's tied.'"

Terms of endearment

On Saturday, Steve Koehler asked for suggestions for nicknames their new grandchild could call him and his wife:

Mel Robinson offers this: "Our grandson calls us Mi Mi and Poppy; our granddaughter calls us Grand Ma J and Grand Paw Mel."

And Dudley Lehew, of Marrero, says, "My daughter, Stephanie, asked me what I wanted to be called when her first child was born.

"I don't know where it came from, but I quickly replied, 'Lord Dudley would be nice.'

"It didn't fly, but my daughter-in-law used it all the time, occasionally shortening it to 'Lordy D.'

"An unexpected bonus was being able to confront someone in my easy chair and say, 'You're sitting on my throne!'"

(Yes, Dudley, you've always been a royal pain…)

Gram's sayings

Perry Rose, of Denham Springs, says this about old sayings, "I would like to mention sayings I heard from my grandmother, but they are not printable."

However, here is one we can print: "I'll be all over you like rust on a muffler."

But a bit chewy…

After Sarah Stravinska, on Saturday, suggested that people who ate beet greens would probably also eat chicken beaks, Donald Landaiche, of Donaldsonville, had this comment:

"You mean to tell me that nobody's ever heard of 'chicken beak gumbo?' It's delicious."

Special People Dept.

Albert M. "Doc" Ory, of Slaughter, celebrated his 90th birthday on Saturday, Nov. 4. He was born and grew up in Baker.

Raw deal

J.B. Castagnos, of Donaldsonville, says, "We were deciding where we would go eat, and one of the younger generation asked if I ate sushi.

"I said no. She asked, 'Why not?'

"I said, 'Because we have a stove.'"

Finishing touch

William Brydon says, "No English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between the words 'complete' and 'finished.'

"In a recent linguistic competition held in London and attended by, supposedly, the best in the world, Samdar Balgobin, a Guyanese man, was the clear winner with a standing ovation which lasted over five minutes.

"The final question was: 'How do you explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand?'

"Here is his astute answer:

"'When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE. When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED. And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!'"

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by fax at (225) 388-0371 or mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.