Smiley will soon return from his Well-Deserved Vacation.

Sticky situation

Tom Adams, of Denham Springs, says all the hoopla about hurricanes reminds him of an incident that occurred after Hurricane Andrew blew through south Louisiana.

After a New Iberia radio station urged people to go to the health unit for inoculations, a lady showed up there and told the receptionist she was Madame Melancon from Pecan Island and was there for her shot.

The receptionist said, “Madame Melancon, you got to get that shot in your precinct.”

Exasperated, the lady responded, “I don’t understand; those ladies right over there are getting ’em in the arm!”

He’s the most

Gibbens Robichaux, of Thibodaux, an organist and pianist, was invited by grandson Michael to his fifth-grade band practice.

Before they started, band director Jimmie Rodrigue introduced Gibbens as “one of the foremost musicians in this area.”

When Michael got home he told his dad: “Mr. Rodrigue introduced Paw Paw as one of the foremost musicians in this area. Who are the other three?”

Machine politics

Avid Reader tells of the time Louisiana sold some of its older voting machines to Mexico for its presidential elections.

When the balloting was over, Edwin Edwards had been elected president of Mexico.

Music major?

Laura Prosser Davis says when son Benjy, 12, took a science test at St. Aloysius School, he was asked, “What is the urethra?”

His answer was, “The first name of a famous American female singer.”

Say what?

Ed D. recalls a foreman who told his workers at morning roll call: “If you’re here, say ‘Here.’ If you’re not here, don’t say nothing.”

The guy was also famous for the line, “Half of you three men come with me.”

Don’t talk about Mama!

In our Creative Insults Dept., I must report a sticker I saw on a car that displayed a “Roll Tide” sticker on one side.

On the other side was “You’re ugly and your mama makes you go to Auburn.”

Lord help us

Glenn V. Freeman, of Prairieville, says a tourist visiting the State Capitol during a session of the Legislature spotted someone in clerical garb.

He asked the sergeant-at-arms who it was, and was told it was the legislative chaplain.

“Oh,” said the tourist, “so he prays for the representatives?”

“No,” he was told, “the chaplain takes a look at the representatives and prays for Louisiana.”