I was on a Disney Bahamian cruise ship, the Dream, with Lynda, our three children, their spouses and our 10 grandchildren when I recalled an old literary teacher, appropriately through his writings.

Gilbert Keith (G.K.) Chesterton, a Catholic convert, newspaper editor and the most-profound religious thinker of the 20th century, stated, in virtually miraculous language, the relationship between a husband and his wife, Frances. He said:

“I think the school is not so important as people think it nowadays. The home is the really important thing and always will be.

“To put the matter in one metaphor, the sexes are two stubborn pieces of iron; if they are to be welded together, it must be while they are red-hot. Every woman has to find out that her husband is a selfish beast, because every man is a selfish beast by the standard of a woman. But let her first find out the best while they are both in the story of ‘Beauty and the Beast.’ Every man has to find out that his wife is cross — that is to say, sensitive to the point of madness; for every woman is mad by the masculine standard. But let him find out that she is mad while her madness is worth considering than anyone else’s sanity.

“It is better that the sexes should misunderstand each other until they marry. ... We do not want the highest mysteries of a Divine distinction to be understood before they are desired, and handled before they are understood.”

I would vouchsafe to say that you will not find this in a printed marriage manual. It is the true romantic realism, vital for all races and their children, black, red, white or yellow.

Vincent T. LoCoco


New Orleans