OK, I give up. Noting all the hype about Joe Burrow and the LSU Tigers, I promised myself I wouldn't add to the pandemonium and would limit comments on Joe and the SEC champs.

But I can't resist airing some of the submissions that made me grin, giggle, chortle, whatever…

  • Avid LSU fan T-Bob Taylor, of Panama City Beach, Florida, reveals that "several weeks ago, I promise, I saw the first paper bag wearer of the year.

"Two Cleveland Browns fans, surrounded by empty seats, had big grocery bags with 'Joe Burrow Watch' in big black lettering."

T-Bob is dreaming about how great it would be for Joe to get his early NFL experience on the same team as Drew Brees, but unless some massive, massive trading is done, I'm afraid that's just a dream.

  • A reader known as "Will" offers Joe the opening line for his Heisman Trophy acceptance speech:

"Ohio, how you like me now?"

  • Ken Best, of Baton Rouge, says the Sunday after Joe and the Tigers had defeated Georgia to win the SEC championship, the scripture lesson in his Sunday School class at Broadmoor Baptist Church was from the New Revised Standard Bible.

Mark 1, Verse 51, reads, "He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud…"

Ken says, "Could not have said it better myself."

Mildly gloating

Speaking of LSU football, some of you might recall that back in August I did my Fearless Football Forecast for the Tigers and predicted a bowl game with Oklahoma!

My gloating is mild because I predicted it would be the Sugar Bowl, not the Peach Bowl in a playoff for the national championship. Also, I saw a 10-2 season for LSU, not its current undefeated run.

Nick the pitchman

Patrick Burke predicts that Nick Saban will retire from Alabama within three seasons. His legacy as a great coach is secure, "but this is the main reason: He has started doing TV commercials. Football coaches who do TV commercials are usually gone within three years. It's an immutable law of nature."

Opie's a star!

Terry Grundmann, of Kenner, says his wife, Wanda, "has rescued and cared for numerous critters.

"When a baby possum was found orphaned in our yard — cats had gotten to the mama — she brought it into our home and bottle fed it until it was old enough to bring to the Northshore Wildlife Rescue facility.

"Two years later, we got a brochure with the cover showing him climbing out of a tree onto a lady's shoulder.

"Wanda said, 'Look, it’s Opie, our poster child!' ”

A bar to remember

More than four decades ago, a Baton Rouge watering hole on Government Street, Ellis' Lounge, had some very faithful regulars.

So faithful, in fact, that they've been gathering every December since the bar closed to remember the good times they had there.

The 41st annual Ellis' Lounge Reunion will be hosted by Smokey Bourgeois from noon to 4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 14, at his George's restaurant on George O'Neal Road.

As always, the gathering will feature "lies, gossip, rumors, innuendo," and no arm wrestling is allowed.

See ya later, litigator

Russ Wise, of LaPlace, adds to our discussion of the ubiquitous sign guys:

"My favorite street corner cardboard sign was the one that read, 'Her lawyer was better than my lawyer.' ”    

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.