Dear Smiley: I had an interesting weekend three weeks ago.
It’s bow season in Georgia, so we went to our son’s deer camp to share the "fun.”
There we saw used recliners from home, cable TV that strangely only picked up the sports network, and lots of good cooking.
No running water or plumbing, but they had figured that out. I thought the "Pot of Gold" faced a beautiful setting — until I spotted the deer stand 3 miles away.
I didn’t know binoculars could see that far.
Did I say we had “fun?” The joys of motherhood…
Choose your cliche
Dear Smiley: With the presidential election nearing and the discussion of states' electoral votes increasing, I was sure that "up for grabs" would be the expression that would dominate television newscasts.
However, with President Trump's hospitalization and subsequent release, it now appears that, at least in the short run, "not out of the woods" is going to be more popular.
Dear Smiley: Regarding the Thursday story about shrimp with heads:
Now living in South Carolina, I have come to realize that south Louisiana has many unique customs.
While visiting friends in Myrtle Beach, I was buying fresh shrimp right off the boat. After the man weighed the shrimp, he dumped them on a table and began taking the heads off.
I almost screamed at him to stop. He looked at me like I was crazy. Then he asked why I wanted the heads on, and I told him we use those for cooking. He then looked at me like I was genuinely crazy.
Oh, if he only knew how much better certain dishes tasted when cooked with a real shrimp stock.
McCormick, South Carolina
Name that bowl
Dear Smiley: On Thursday, a reader said the relocated LSU-Missouri game should be called the Topsy-Turvy Bowl, where “The winner gets an engraved upside-down bowl.”
Smiley, is that something like a gumbo bowl, or something one sits on? Just wondering.
Bay St. Louis, Mississippi
Dear Pat: It would be the former. The latter is the Toilet Bowl, played earlier between LSU and Mississippi State.
Dear Smiley: Sometimes The Advocate packages the Life section and the Sports section together, so that only one can be read at a time.
For the long married, together more than normal, this creates a "discussion" over breakfast that is not enjoyed. Just saying…
Take it, please!
Dear Smiley: Oh, great keeper of the throngs of wise readers, please answer one example of my dozens of "retirement" questions:
"My now-closed office had MANY garbage cans. How do I get our garbage truck at my house to pick up ONE unwanted medium-sized plastic kitchen garbage container?
After several passes, we have given up. After being left AGAIN this morning, we put the empty into our bigger container today. Otherwise they have been good to us and have picked up dozens of things. Ideas?
Panama City Beach, Florida
Dear T-Bob: After many attempts, I learned it is impossible to throw away an unwanted garbage can. My advice is to fill it with dirt, plant flowers in it, and learn to live with it.
Senior citizen blues
Dear Smiley: I keep getting offers in the mail to attend a free hearing examination, but I can’t read the smaller text telling me where the location is.
Song of the year
Dear Smiley: Do you get songs stuck in your head? Ones that are not as bad as ear worms, but they still pop into your head often?
Mine has been “Welcome to My Nightmare” by Alice Cooper.
Dear Tim: Sounds like a perfect anthem for 2020. Another would be Merle Haggard's "I Think I'll Just Stay Here and Drink."
Year without end
Dear Smiley: I have bad news for Algie Petrere, Lee Bouqui, and others calling for an early end to the year — 2020 won’t end on Thanksgiving, and maybe not even on New Year’s Eve.
The way it’s been acting it may not even be over by July 4…