Here's a little story from our "How to Embarrass Your Mom" file:

"It happened 15 years ago, but I still remember it," says Wayne Evans, of Carencro:

"My grandson Christian had overheard his dad (our son) talking about all the steps he had to take when applying for a job.

"When Christian went with his mom to be assessed for kindergarten, after he finished the assessment procedure he asked the teacher, 'When do I pee in the cup?'"

Buckle up

Charlie Anderson says, "Federal regulations require that we all receive the 'safety lecture' before every flight.

"When I was traveling frequently, I remember the Southwest Airlines folks always had the most fun presenting the lecture.

"My favorite: 'For those of you who haven’t ridden in an automobile since 1967, we’re going to show you how to use a seat belt.’ ”

When mules attack

Dudley Lehew, of Marrero, says the Canadian problem of moose licking cars (for the road salt) could be handled by putting some Tabasco hot sauce on the vehicle — although this might damage the paint job more than the moose.

He adds that the moose situation "reminds me of an overnight stay in the Arkansas Ozarks.

“The next morning, I found my car's hood raked with large scratches where my host's mules tried to bite their reflection.

"Believe it or not, my insurance paid for the paint redo, even though I filled the 'Cause of Damage' blank on my application with 'Bit by mules!’ ”

For the defense

Gerald Dubroc says, "My two 3-year-old great-grandsons were playing on the stairs when Bennett started crying.

"When their two mothers rushed in and asked Hudson what happened, he answered, 'He fell and fell, and then he didn't! He quickly added, 'And I didn't push him!’ ”

Waste not

Emmett Irwin says, "My parents lived through the Depression, and learned how to be very thrifty.

"When I was growing up in the '50s and '60s, I would come home from school and would find containers of milk on the counter. My mother would leave this milk out until it curdled and soured. She would then take cheesecloth and pour the remaining liquid through it to catch the curds in the cloth and make cottage cheese.

"She was also thrifty with soap. She would save the small pieces, and when she had enough she would put them in a pot and melt them to form new bars of soap.

"I never ate her cottage cheese, but the soap worked very well."

Tragedy remembered

Former Baton Rouge resident Dez Crawford, now in Portland, Oregon, says, "I am (slowly) writing a book about haunted places in Baton Rouge, and I am having some trouble with a detail in my research.

"You no doubt recall that in 1974, the balcony at the Common Ground (a popular LSU student hangout) collapsed, killing at least one person and injuring 30 or 40 people.

"For the sake of accuracy and respect for the dead, I want to confirm the number of dead and injured, and the name of the person killed."

If you can help, she's at dezcrawford@gmail.com.

Special People Dept.

  • Faune (Mrs. John) Ruppe Futral, of Port Barre, celebrated her 104th birthday Sunday, Dec. 6. She is active in the Port Barre Methodist Church and the Young at Heart Club.
  • Randolph Trappey, of Lafayette, celebrates his 92nd birthday Tuesday, Dec. 8.
  • Ethel Sexton, of Baton Rouge, celebrates her 90th birthday Tuesday, Dec. 8.

Eternal hammer

Daryl Berg says our stories of long-lasting appliances "reminded me of the old carpenter who claimed he had used the same hammer for over 50 years.

"He said he only replaced the head twice and the handle three times."

Bless you

Algie Petrere, of Central, says, "With all that's going on in the world, we can use some inspiration. Someone sent me this Irish blessing, so I'm passing it on to you:

"May the light always find you on a dreary day.

When you need to be home, may you find your way.

May you always have courage to take a chance,

And never find frogs in your underpants."


Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.