Around this time of year, my Well-Deserved Vacation is coming up, usually at Bubba's Exxon, Motel & Bait Shop in Back Brusly.
But it won't be happening. First, I doubt that Bubba is booking guests, and second, I have COVID-19.
Our doctor says if Lady Katherine and I quarantine for the next week or so and the symptoms don't get worse, there's a good chance we can get through this while staying home.
I realize this is highly personal, but I felt I should share it to explain why we're even less visible than normal.
By the way, I got the diagnosis Friday. Friday the 13th in 2020 — what could possibly go wrong?
And on with the column ...
Sheila Stagnoli continues our series on the wisdom of children:
"When my granddaughter Sami first started school, she came home one day and told me she had received a mark from her teacher.
"I asked why. She said she was dancing, and explained, 'I was sitting in my chair and I felt like dancing, so I got up and danced.'
"I looked at her, smiled, and said, 'You keep on dancing, baby!'
"Maybe we as Americans should just stand up, take a deep breath and dance. I do feel like dancing, and someday we will dance again."
A Louisiana thing
Bob Martin, of Lawrenceville, Georgia, says, "The day after Easter 1968, fellow workers and I were having lunch in Lake Charles.
"Larry had finished his sandwiches, and had just cracked the last of 3 Easter eggs when a co-worker asked if had another one. Larry said he didn't.
"Our boss walked into the room just in time to hear the guy explain, 'Someone told me you could tap the end of it with a spoon and blow, and the shell would easily peel off.'
"The boss asked, 'What are y'all talking about ... oysters?’ ”
More alarming news
After Joe Fairchild told of an encounter with the alarm on an electric toothbrush, readers told of similar experiences:
- Ernie Gremillion, of Baton Rouge, says, "Some time ago, I was returning home from a golf round when I got a phone call from my wife, who was a bit upset.
"She had attempted to place something in our garbage can when she heard a noise coming from it that sounded like some type of animal in distress.
"I checked it out as soon as I got home, and immediately realized what was going on.
"Before I left the house, I did a cleaning out of my medicine cabinet, which involved throwing away an old electric toothbrush. It apparently landed in the garbage can in the 'on' position."
- Gwen Fontenot, of Baton Rouge, says, "My daughter told me to call the air conditioner man; the unit had an extra hum to it, which could be something serious.
"The AC man came and checked it out with his son. The son said, 'Dad, do you hear that sound?' Turns out when our AC came on, the AC at the church across the street kicked on. Mystery solved.
"Good news; the AC was due for winter checkup, so no extra service call."
Regarding mentions of old words, Jim Templeton, of St. Amant, says, 'My grandmother, born in 1878, had a word for all that junk lying around the house. She called it 'plunder.’ ”
Nice People Dept.
Kent Dawson says, "My Advocate delivery lady is 'mo gooder' than all y'all's! I'm in a wheelchair, and Ms. Dot comes up my ramp and puts it in a chair next to my door. I even got homegrown tomatoes from her."
Special People Dept.
- Janie Felder Neyland, of Baton Rouge, celebrates her 93rd birthday Tuesday, Nov. 17.
- Larry and Mary Billson Triche, of Norco, celebrate their 58th anniversary Tuesday, Nov. 17.
- Laurie and Russ Kercher, of Mandeville, celebrate their 58th anniversary Tuesday, Nov. 17.