I love stories about the way kids view the world:

Charlie Anderson says, "Once at my brother-in-law’s house (a struggling school teacher at the time), I was sitting next to his desk.

"My 4-year-old niece was telling me about her daddy’s desk: 'This where he keeps his pencils and stuff, this is where papers are, and this is where he puts his bills, bills, bills!'"

Those "v" words 

On Saturday Bill Reed, of Broussard, told of the "Mollyisms" of his 6-year-old granddaughter Molly. Here's more:

"OK, here is another Mollyism:

"On the day after Veteran's Day, she called me on the speaker phone from her mother’s car and said her teacher had the class color some pictures because of 'Veterinarians Day.' She added that her mother, my daughter, told her I was a veterinarian.

"At that point, her 10-year-old sister, Mary-Grace, piped up and said I was not a veterinarian; I was a vegetarian, so I couldn’t eat meat.

"Molly responded, 'That can’t be true, because Gramps likes hamburgers.'

"After straightening that out, Molly then asked me if I had ever been to a war. I responded in the affirmative, because I did spend a little time in a Southeast Asian country.

"At that point, both Molly and Mary-Grace were somewhat speechless, and said to their mom, 'Gramps was in a war!'"

Busy that day

The above mention of Veteran's Day reminds me of this story from Brainerd S. Montgomery, of New Orleans:

"In a recent column you mentioned that R. Richardson King was celebrating his 100th birthday on Oct. 13.

"I share the same birthday as Dick and have known him most of my life, and your column reminded me to call and wish him happy birthday."

"I was lucky to get him at home, as he was headed out to a celebratory luncheon with old friends. I complimented him on having aged so well, and mentioned that I had been born on Oct. 13, 1942.

"There was a pause, then Dick said, 'Hmm, 1942; I was at Guadalcanal.”

"He served his country when called, has been a productive citizen and has lived the good life. Happy birthday, Dick!"

The hole story

Sara Bradley says, "I just read the cute bit in the Thursday column about the fellow enjoying ice delivered by a horse cart as a child.

"But when I got to the part about 'drilling a hole in the floor of the rented house to drain the melted water,' having been both a tenant and landlord, all I could think was 'kiss that security deposit goodbye!'”

No English here

P.J. Bourgeois, of Opelousas, says, "Recent mentions of Plaucheville in your column brought back this memory:

"As a young boy at Devall School in West Baton Rouge Parish, my best friend was Ronald Couvillion.

"I once went to spend a weekend at his home. On Sunday morning, we all got into the car and drove to Plaucheville, where his father's parents lived, and where we attended Mass.

"In those days, the Mass was in Latin, and the priest in Plaucheville gave his sermon in French. Not a word of English was used in that service.

"I wish we still had such Masses in Louisiana."

Pouring pets?

Pat Plaisance, of New Orleans, says, "Overuse and misuse of 'literally' drives me batty.

"At the grocery store, I was waiting for the rain to abate before making a dash for the car.

"A young women came running from the parking lot. Speaking to someone on her phone, she commented 'It is literally raining cats and dogs!'

"I checked the sky for falling poodles and calicos but saw nary a one."

Creative cussing

After we discussed alternatives to curse words, we heard from Marvin:

"I attended a church college where using swear words was seriously discouraged.

"One creative fellow came up with this substitute when his displeasure needed to be expressed: 'Got dandruff and some of it itches!' He never got in trouble!"

Very clever, Marvin, but I'm afraid it's too long to use when I hit my finger with a hammer while trying to nail something…


Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.