Tom Musser tells a chilling tale of the hazards of a marital misunderstanding involving beer:

"In the early ’70s, I drove to Houston to witness a pressure test. I informed my then wife that I would be spending the night there.

"The test finished early, so I decided to drive back to Baton Rouge. I stopped in Orange, Texas, to fill up and buy a case of Coors beer and a bag of ice to keep it cold in my ice chest.

"When I arrived home, I let my wife know I was home, not realizing she didn’t really wake up. I placed the case in the fridge and dumped the ice in the sink.

"I then heard a clicking noise from the back of the house. Having partially closed the hallway door, I opened it to see my wife standing there — the noise being the racking of a shell in my shotgun!

"I persuaded her not to shoot, and thus lived to tell this story.

"But that was the best tasting beer I ever drank. And I resolved to call home from a pay phone the next time!"

Dead drunk

Speaking of the dangers of beer drinking, Ralph Drouin, of Baton Rouge, tells this droll tale:

"The recent articles about armadillos reminded me of the times I would take trips to Avoyelles Parish to visit my parents.

"Oftentimes, along this route, I would see an armadillo that, after being hit by a vehicle, would make it to the shoulder of the road and expire.

"On one trip, I noticed someone had placed an empty beer can on the belly of the upside down deceased creature. The can on the belly of the creature with its four legs pointing to the sky was a sight to behold!"

Going for cover

Gail Stephenson, of Baton Rouge, offers this helpful hint for recycling:

"I use those political mailings and cards to cut patterns for my quilt blocks. The paper is heavy enough for multiple uses, and as a bonus, I get to stick pins in the pictures of the politicians I don't like."

Mystery candidate

Speaking of elections, Gertie M. Beauford tells this story of a close race:

"One late Saturday night in Morganza my grandmother, who worked for the school board, told my parents to run over quickly and vote for 'Johnny' (who?).

"They were the last two to vote in the precinct. He won by TWO votes. So everybody in the town then knew who had won the election for 'Johnny' (who?)."

Special People Dept.

Norman "Buck" Grantham, of Denham Springs, celebrates his 91st birthday Tuesday, Oct. 15.

Funny bugs

Nobey Benoit says, "All the talk about armadillos reminded me about the little pill bugs (roly polys) that we played with when we were kids. Are they still around, or did we kill them off with our pesticides?"

I haven't seen them around lately — not that I've been looking for them. But I, too, recall how the little critters would roll up into a tiny ball when you touched them. They were fun to play with in class, when I should have been paying attention to the teacher.

Nobey says the ThoughtCo. website has interesting information about them.

The site says, "The pill bug goes by many names — roly-poly, woodlouse, armadillo bug, potato bug, but whatever you call it, it's a fascinating creature — or actually 4,000 species of creature.

"The nocturnal crustaceans have seven pairs of legs, segmented sections like a lobster's tail, and prefer humid environments. They eat rotting vegetation and help nutrients in it get returned to the soil for plants to feed on, so they're not pests. They don't bother living vegetation."

Rough rider

T-Bob Taylor, of Panama City Beach, Florida, continues our camel seminar:

"On a tour of Israel we saw nomads with camels. The tour bus stopped, and I accepted an offer of a ride.

"Riding a camel is a lot like surfing. You are going one direction, and below you everything else is shifting mercilessly. It wasn't fun."

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.