Karen Poirrier, of Lutcher, says, "While babysitting granddaughters Kenley, 4, and Kennison, 1, at their home in Paulina, we sat at the dining room table eating breakfast.

"With no transition from the topic being discussed, Kenley blurted, 'Grandmother, you speak incorrectly.'

Karen, a retired educator, was surprised, and asked "Why?"

"Because you say 'a-gain' and everybody else says 'a-gin,' Kenley responded with a 'You need to improve your speech' look on her face while she shook her head back and forth."

Dangerous error

Richard Fossey, of Baton Rouge, says, "Charlotte, a family friend, visited a New Orleans bar a while back and asked the bartender to recommend a drink.

"He brought her a Madras, which contains vodka, cranberry juice and orange juice.

"Charlotte liked the drink and decided to have another. Unfortunately, she misheard the drink's name, and when a second bartender came by, she said, 'I'd like a mattress.'

"It took a while before that misunderstanding got straightened out, but I understand Charlotte eventually got a second Madras."

Dinner call

My recent cat story brought this one from John Torbert:

"Many years ago, in Baton Rouge, we had a cat who lived with us for 13 years.

"Dusty's favorite lounging place was the top shelf in the closet of our daughter's room.

"At dinner time in the dining room, at the other end of the house, as I began to return thanks, there was a loud 'klump' then 'gallump, gallump' down the hall — and she was sitting by my wife's chair waiting to be given her piece of chicken."

How sweet it was

Bob Hebert, of Baton Rouge, says, "Now well into my 70th decade, I’ve been reminiscing lately about my youth growing up in the ‘50s in Donaldsonville, where my father managed, and later owned, the Grand Theater (which eventually became a victim of time and technology).

"Outside of its Hollywood fare, the Grand’s major claim to fame was its sweet popcorn, which was unlike Cracker Jacks or other caramel varieties. It was made with pure white sugar and didn’t clump together like the gooey brown stuff.

"Locals became infatuated with this version, and some patrons liked to mix sweet and savory by ordering a 'half-and-half,' which the Grand willingly provided.

"My older cousin Lee Landry reports that on his first visit to a 'big city' cinema in Baton Rouge, he walked to the concession stand and asked for a box of ‘half-and-half.’

“'They looked at me like I had three heads,' he said."

Which reminds me

Lady K's nephew Wes and wife, Michelle, live in Chicago and on special occasions send us a tin of Chicago's famed Garrett popcorn, half cheddar cheese and half caramel (which doesn't clump together for some reason).

The salty-sweet combo must be something like Bob Hebert recalls in his story above. It's delicious and addictive.

Which also reminds me

Back when Tom Mitchell, a great guy, was managing Baton Rouge's late lamented Paramount Theater, he'd stand out in front and chat with folks passing by on Third Street.

If business was slow, when I walked up, he'd say, "Come on in and see the movie, on me. But you have to promise to buy popcorn — that's where we make our money."  

Phone people

Mary Nell Barringer says, "After 48 years as a 24-hour crisis line, 'The Phone' and the Baton Rouge Crisis Intervention Center have closed shop."

She hopes to have a reunion of former volunteers but has lost contact with many of them. if you were part of this life-saving service, contact her at mnobarr@gmail.com.

Special People Dept.

Emma Lean Haney celebrates her 92nd birthday Tuesday, Aug. 28.

Litigious elf?

Rayne Penney says, "Baton Rouge attorney Gordon McKernan's advertisements are everywhere. If you live in Louisiana, you are hit with his face every time you drive.

"A fun idea to get children to behave at Christmas:

"Tell your children that Gordon is actually one of Santa's elves, and every advertisement is a camera monitoring your child's behavior.

"That way, when you are driving, you will have perfect angels who will listen intently."

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.