I thought we had wrapped up tales of LSU's Kirby Smith dorm, but this story is too good to pass up:

Roy J., of Baton Rouge, says as a Marine in Vietnam he was in an airborne unit, making three combat jumps.

He says in the late '60s, when he lived on the top floor of the 13-story dorm, "I had my parachute and harness in my locker in case of fire.

"It was always on my mind that I could jump out the window. Having jumped off the 250-foot tower at Fort Benning, I knew I could jump the 200 feet or so."

So, one windy day at the end of the fall semester, when most residents had gone home for Christmas, "I placed my canopy gradually out the window until I was pulled out.

"I drifted north over the parking lot, making a perfect landing."

He says "a couple of kids on bikes" saw him and were "quite excited" about the jump.

Roy thought no one else saw him, "but when I returned for the spring semester, all the windows were welded shut."

Sick story

"The COVID lockdown and remote schooling seem to have brought about a renewed appreciation for in-person learning," says Gail Stephenson, of Baton Rouge.

"After her parents and grandparents were fully vaccinated, granddaughter Zelda returned to her first grade classroom at LaSalle Elementary, after almost eight months of Zoom instruction.

"When the class had to revert to Zoom for a few days while other grades took the LEAP test, she told her mom, 'You know how you get homesick when you are away from home? I am schoolsick.'”

Divine misunderstanding

"M" says, "Some 65-plus years ago in Donaldsonville, our mothers would pick us up for lunch and return us to school. Before we left the classroom, students would all recite the Angelus Prayer.

"As a second-grader, I was on the way home for lunch when I asked my mother why the Blessed Mother and the Holy Spirit always had chicken for lunch: 'You know, chicken-ceives of the Holy Spirit?'

"She was laughing so hard she was forced to pull over and park. I had to wait many years before I learned that 'conceived' had nothing to do with poultry.

"I wish to remain anonymous, so I don’t have to listen to my three sons convulsing in laughter!"

Save the ducks

Mary Pramuk, of Baton Rouge, says trapping wildlife in litter is not new:

"When I get a case of the blues, my husband says, 'Let’s go down to the lake and see some ducks.' I especially love Muscovy ducks, who do not quack, they hiss.

"When I spent a summer on my uncle’s farm in Canada, one day we saw a flock of Muscovys walking toward the farm’s garbage pit, where old canning jars with rubber rings had been dumped.

"When they returned, several wore the rings round their necks. We went to catch them and pull off the rings, but when we found them resting not one ring was on any duck; somehow they had shed them."

Special People Dept.

— Mae Broussard, of Port Allen, celebrates her 98th birthday Monday, May 3. Neighbor John Blackwell says, "Two of her favorite things are boiled crawfish and your column." (And after she reads it, she can have boiled crawfish ON my column!)

— Lucille Hughes, of Baton Rouge, celebrates her 95th birthday Monday, May 3.

— Elsie Manos, of Metairie, celebrates her 94th birthday Monday, May 3. She was an East Jefferson Hospital volunteer for 26 years.

Escape plan

Barbara Andrepont says her mom, Lucille Hughes (95 on Monday) "learned to ski at Henderson Lake in her 30s. She was very motivated to get up on the skis, to escape the snakes and alligators in the lake. She knew she wasn’t going to out-swim them."

Damp strange behavior

Rick Marshall says, "After being caught in a thunderstorm, thought I'd try the old adage 'Let a smile be your umbrella.'

"I found people are a little put off by someone who is soaking wet grinning at them."

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.