There's something about the solemn Lenten season that moves my readers to get even sillier.
Michael Hess, of Slidell, responding to tales of old cowboy flicks, offers "Things you'll never hear in a western movie:"
"I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist. IN A DIRTY MUG!"
"Gentlemen, rather than get caught up in mindless reaction, let's draw upon our feminine selves for a more intuitive solution."
"You 'n' Slim round up them strays, and I'll tell Cookie to get started on the gazpacho and the fondue."
"That's him! That's the yella-bellied varmint who shot my therapist!"
"He was a strong man, a good marshal, and I reckon he had a keen eye for interior decoration."
"Hey, Buck, do these chaps make my butt look big?"
"It's like I keep tellin' ya, Earl: men is from Tombstone, women is from Dodge."
Richard Orgeron says "hungry student" stories "reminded me of when I was at USL in 1960.
"The student cafeteria didn’t honor meal tickets on weekends, so I was on my own when it came to eating.
"One Saturday night I was hungry, so I walked the few blocks from campus to downtown Lafayette — which was dead, dead, DEAD!
"One cafe was open — Pop Stenson’s. I walked in close to closing time, and was the only one there. I sat at the counter and asked Pop what he had for 25 cents — that was all I had.
"He said, 'How about a nice bowl of hot chili?'
"I said, 'That sounds good.'
"When he served it up, he said, 'A scoop of rice would go good with that chili.' I nodded. He added the rice.
"He then said, 'A slice of French bread would also go good,' serving up a healthy slice of warm French bread.
"When finished, I paid the 25 cents, thanked Pop and walked back to campus very satisfied. Those were the times!"
Taste of Louisiana
Charlanne Cress, of Zachary, says when brother-in-law Martin Buser completes his 36th Iditarod Sled Dog Race, the thousand miles or so from Anchorage to Nome, Alaska, he'll have a culinary treat awaiting him.
Martin, four-time champion of the Iditarod and five-time recipient of the Leonard Seppala Award for outstanding care of his dog team, was in fifth place Wednesday.
Says Charlanne, "He will be feasting on Louisiana sweet yam and pecan casserole when he gets to Nome. I shipped all ingredients there for my sister Kathy, an LSU graduate, to prepare for him."
Nice People Dept.
It happened years ago, but Sandra Adams is still grateful to a New Orleans policeman:
"New to Louisiana, I attended a conference at a Canal Street hotel, then went shopping with a fellow attendee and had dinner in the Quarter.
"We realized too late there was a Carnival parade on Canal. Wearing business clothes and carrying Saks bags, we began walking behind the crowd.
"A friendly policeman stopped us, warned this was dangerous, and walked us back to the hotel."
Special People Dept.
- Pauline Yuhasz Bartus, of Hungarian Settlement near Albany, celebrates her 93rd birthday Sunday, March 10.
- Clifton "Chief" Matherne, former principal and coach at Shady Grove High School, celebrated his 90th birthday Feb. 14. He lives in Mount Pleasant, Texas.
- Herb and Aggie Smith, of River Ridge, celebrate their 61st anniversary Friday, March 8.
B.J. Gowdy adds to our stories of grandparents and the kids they spoil:
"My grandsons are being raised by a mom who believes in healthy living, with a limit on things like junk food and sweets.
"While babysitting several years ago, we cooked a healthy breakfast. The oldest boy looked up and asked for his dessert.
"I said I didn't think his mom would allow a breakfast dessert. With that sweet, innocent face looking up at me, he said, 'Well, Nanna, we don't have to tell her, do we?'
"Over the next couple of years I learned this boy would talk me into breaking the rules — and then meet his mom at the door, telling her about my rule breaking!"