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Advocate columnist Smiley Anders

Ann Purnell Collom, of Kenner, tells of a surprise dinner:

"We had friends from the Atlanta area come for a visit in the 1980s. They brought another couple with them for their first visit down here.

"After eating all of the good crawfish, Wendell, the visitor new to Louisiana ways, decided to take some back, start a crawfish farm and make a fortune. He spent about $200 for crawfish and shipping.

"The next day we got a call from our friends Carol and Albert, who said, 'Wendell said he put all the crawfish in his catfish pond. He went to check on them this morning and they were all missing! He wants to know what happened.'

"We were laughing so hard as we explained that those catfish enjoyed a delicious dinner of crawfish!"

Weird wild west

Harold Mayeux winds up our seminar on old western movies with these observations:

"When the 'good' cowboy would chase the bad guy on horses, they would shoot at each other for miles, never reloading, and never hitting the horse, and their hats would never fly off.

"When the good cowboy would eventually tackle the bad guy, they always had to roll down a hill while fighting.

"When the lady would get stuck in the runaway covered wagon (or stagecoach), the hero always caught up on his horse from behind, jumped on the wagon, got dragged underneath for about five miles, and finally made his way to the lead horse to stop the wagon.

"The train robbers would always just pull a handkerchief over their noses and never got recognized in public, even with the same clothes and the handkerchiefs still around their necks.

"When a brawl would start in the saloon, someone always got thrown over the bar into the liquor bottles, and men would have big wooden chairs and liquor bottles smashed on them but never got seriously hurt. They would also always fly through the swinging doors, and keep fighting in the street.

"They only used 'bloodless' bullets. You never saw a drop of blood when anyone was shot.

"And, most famous of all, the movie always ended with the hero riding off into the sunset with the lady."

Not always, Harold; sometimes it was just him and his horse…but he did always tell her "I may be back around these parts some day."

Special People Dept.

  • Ed Deumite celebrated his 98th birthday Monday, Feb. 4.
  • Sylvia Bailey Eppinett, of Baton Rouge, celebrates her 93rd birthday Saturday, Feb. 9. She is a native of Lutcher.
  • Pauline "Miss Polly" "Granny" Hebert, of Lafayette, celebrates her 93rd birthday Saturday, Feb.9.
  • Clyde David, of New Roads, celebrated his 91st birthday Tuesday, Feb. 5.
  • Ann Lucas, of Harahan, celebrates her 90th birthday Sunday, Feb. 10. She is a member of the Silver Slammers basketball team that will be in the Nationals Senior Olympic Games in June in Albuquerque, New Mexico.
  • Buddy and Karen Poirrier, of Lutcher, celebrate their 55th anniversary Friday, Feb. 8.

Secret of longevity?

Norman Deumite says his brother Ed, who just celebrated his 98th birthday (mentioned under "Special People" above), had some habits that might have contributed to his long life:

"He ate at least 3 apples a day for over 50 years. That is more than 54,750 apples.

"He was also an avid walker. He walked 10 miles 7 days a week for over 35 years, and 5 miles a day for 5 years.

"That is over 135,000 miles. To put that in perspective, it would be 48 times across the United States or 5.42 times around the world."

So there you have it. Head to the store for some apples — and walk there.

Speaking of health

Wayne LeCompte, of Metairie, our unpaid medical consultant, offers these two doctor stories (with apologies, I assume):

1. "A doctor held a stethoscope up to Boudreaux's chest. Boudreaux asked, 'Doc, how do I stand?'

"The doctor says, 'That's what puzzles me!'"

2. "Thibodeaux tells the doctor: 'I have a ringing in my ears.'

"The doctor says to Thibodeaux: 'Don't answer!'"

Write Smiley at Smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.