Mariano Hinojosa issues this warning to Neighborhood Watch members:

"Do not call the police on suspicious people walking in your neighborhood! Those are your neighbors without makeup and hair extensions!"

Politically speaking

Bill Timken, of Metairie, says, "While COVID-19 masking has led to politicians now finding it difficult to talk out of both sides of their mouth, it's made me something of a politician: I'm now masking my words!"

Home of the "bubblah"

Lise Kaufman says, "When my husband and I lived in Providence, Rhode Island, in the early '80s, a child asked me, while I was working in a medical office, where was 'the bubblah.'

"It took me a minute, but I asked if he meant the water fountain. His mom said, 'Oh, you must be from the South: you said "fowntin"!'

"We could add many more 'Rho Dyland-isms,' but it would make a long column!"

Doubly deceptive

After mentions of "Library" bars near LSU and UNO, Terry Grundmann, of Kenner, says college town Lafayette not only had "a bar with the handy name of 'The Library,' down the street was another named 'The Dorm.'

"You could honestly tell your parents you spent most of your night at The Library, the rest at The Dorm."

Hiding out

"Speaking of appropriately named bars," says Gary Newport, of Baton Rouge, "one I remember most fondly was in Alexandria, and may still be.

"The downtown bar was named 'He Ain’t Here.'"

Porch perching

Joanne Moulton tells why in these stay-at-home days, sitting on the front porch can provide an entertaining free nature show:

"I've viewed hawks, and once an eagle, soaring above; waved to joggers and dog-walkers; seen trees making green waves in the breeze, and rooted for the tiny birds scaring away squirrels on the wires leading to the pole top where their nest is located.

"And all this is with 19 (count 'em, 19) telephone wires, cables, and electric wires crossing my view!"

What's up, dock?

Baton Rouge author Mary Ann Sternberg, having chronicled the River Road in two previous books, has turned her attention to Baton Rouge's old municipal dock on the Mississippi:

"I'm researching the dock, in use from 1926 to 1954. It grew derelict over the years, until the Water Institute of the Gulf was built there in 2018.

"I'd love to get some stories from Baton Rougeans who saw the dock during its days of commerce, as well as folks who sneaked onto the site for frat parties, etc., after it was no longer in use.

"Please send reminiscences, information, and photos to"

Nice People Dept.

Helen Rankin tells of shopping at the Dollar Tree on Burbank Drive in Baton Rouge:

"I keep my 3-year-old granddaughter, since both of her parents are essential workers. I wanted to get a few new things to keep her entertained, since we have been staying at home for the most part.

"As we were checking out, the cashier told us to have a good rest of the day. I commented that I was going to look for masks for us, since I had not yet been able to find them.

"She said, 'Wait a minute,' went to her personal bag and gave me two masks in a plastic bag.

"I was so appreciative of her kindness. Needless to say, she made my day."

Special People Dept.

  • Doveal Essex, a retired faculty member at Southern University, celebrated her 99th birthday Saturday, May 9.
  • Vina Glynn, of Plaquemine, celebrates her 97th birthday Monday, May 11.
  • Nell and Calvin Golden celebrated their 68th anniversary Sunday, May 10. He is a Marine veteran of the Korean War and participated in the battle for the Chosin Reservoir in North Korea in 1950.

Price of neglect

A Lafayette reader says, "Got on the scale this morning and was not happy with the numbers. Then I noticed my footprints in the dust on top the scale.

"Umm…should have gotten on that scale more often…and sooner."

Thought for the Day

It takes a village to deal with our current pandemic, so you can expect a few village idiots to show up.

Write Smiley at He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 588, Baton Rouge, LA 70821. Follow Smiley Anders on Twitter, @SmileyAndersAdv.